“The difference between you and me is my training. I have negative thoughts just like you. But I stay in them for seconds, and you stay in them for who knows how long.” ~Novak Djokovic (recounting a conversation with a Buddhist monk)
Hey Reader!
Hi. I’m Wendy. I’m Tucker’s mom.
I’m writing this from Alicante, Spain, where Tucker is playing his third year of professional basketball. This past weekend, I was walking along the Mediterranean, thinking about his journey. And mine. (It was January 1st.)
But honestly, I was thinking about yours, too.
Because I keep hearing the same concern from parents whose kids want to play college basketball or even varsity: “We’re worried we’re behind.”
Parents tell me they’re anxious because their 9th grader hasn't hit a growth spurt yet. Or their 10th grader isn’t getting many varsity minutes. Or their 11th grader hasn’t heard back from a single college coach.
If it makes you feel better, neither did Tucker.
When you look at him now - playing pro in Spain, successful Division I career - it’s easy to assume it was a straight line.
It wasn’t. Far from it.
Here’s a glimpse of what you don’t see on his YouTube channel or Instagram:
- Tucker played on 7 different AAU teams. Coaches left. Programs fell apart. Sometimes he was the best player. Sometimes the fit was just wrong. Every move meant starting over. And he was a shy kid.
- He was invisible on the Under Armour circuit. On his first 17U team, he barely played. Because he was young for his grade, the coach moved him to the 16U team where he found himself fighting for minutes behind future high-major D1 players like Naz Reid and Jahvon Quinnerly.
- It was crickets. While other kids posted “blessed to receive an offer,” we heard nothing. He enrolled in a post-grad year specifically because he didn’t have an offer. He finally signed with Colgate just weeks before that prep year started.
- He played terribly when coaches actually showed up. I still remember sitting with Matt Langel, Colgate’s head coach, while Tucker had one of his worst post-grad games. Tucker was convinced Coach Langel was going to regret his decision and pull the scholarship offer. (He didn't).
- He went on a 15-game shooting slump. In his fifth year of college, after being named Preseason Player of the Year, Tucker couldn't seem to buy a bucket.
- He has always struggled with the mental game. Still does.
Why am I sharing this?
Because I was there for all of it. So was my husband.
We were there at his first Under Armour game in 11th grade when he turned the ball over twice, missed a shot, and was benched for most of the weekend. He played about 15 total minutes across four games. We were there when he met us after the last game. He'd clearly been crying.
We were there when the offers didn’t come. We were at all 15 Colgate games during that slump.
If you’re looking at your son or daughter’s journey right now and all you see is struggle and uncertainty, I know that feeling in your stomach.
I know how hard it is to watch them hurt and feel like you can’t fix it. But all players go through it, even if it doesn't seem like it.
My advice: don’t compare your child’s raw, unedited footage to someone else’s highlight reel.
Tucker didn’t make it to Spain because he was perfect. He made it because he refused to quit when he wasn’t.
If your child’s journey feels rough right now, that's ok. It's supposed to be hard. They're striving for something most kids aren't.
Basketball is often the first place kids experience any real adversity. And honestly? That's a gift. Because they are learning how to fight for something that matters to them in an environment where the stakes are still manageable.
Been there. Done that.
Wendy (Tucker's mom)
P.S. If your kid is struggling with the mental game, our Unshakeable Confidence video series can be game-changing. It’s $49 and packed with the tools that actually worked for Tucker. But if money is tight right now, reply to this email and let us know. We don’t want cost to be the reason a young athlete doesn't get access to this amazing resource.
